new beginnings

I've been thinking back over the past year and the sheer devastation that it delivered. The Tsunami that hit Asia and stole away over 227,000 lives in a matter of minutes. It seemed so far away and difficult to understand. There were entire cities demolished with fewer than ten survivors. In the entire city! It's mind boggling. Then there was Hurricane Katrina right here in the U.S. And we were suddenly dealt a blow that smacked us with such force that we were made to pay attention. Much like 9/11. The death and devastation weren't thousands of miles way anymore and easy to shut out. They were here, where we felt safe. In our country.

Such massive natural disasters dwarf personal drama. But that has been going on a lot this year as well. Many of my friends, as well as myself, were forced to go through extreme personal crisis and find a way to perservere. Well I've spent some time reflecting on all of this natural and emotional turmoil and have discovered some very fundamental truths.

(1) Through extreme tragedy and chaos emerge great strength and courage. When you are forced to deal with the unimaginable, you find ways to make it through. You find ways to pick up not only yourself, but to help those around you.
(2) Following complete devasataion comes great opportunity for new beginnings. It is our nature as human beings to rebuild. Be it a tsunami, a hurricane, a flood, war, or on a smaller scale, death, heartbreak, or the loss of things familiar to you, we as people always pick up the pieces and create a new reality.

What I dream for 2006, is that it be a year of new beginnings. For those in the Tsunami and Hurricane ravaged areas, for my friends who have endured more personal turmoil than most could imagine and yet perservered, and for myself. Let us all rebuild. Stronger than before. Let our heartbreak and disappointment fuel our desire to make positive changes and grow from the forced education that comes in times of great tragedy. Let us have the strength to let go of those who hold us back, to stay positive in the face of challenges, to seek out opportunities that will better our lives, and most of all, let us not be afraid of the change that is required in exchange for fulfillment. Let the changes we make impact not only ourselves, but our families, our friends, and generations yet to come.

Yes, 2005 was a year of let down and tears. But 2006 will be the year we reclaim our dreams, our aspirations, and our drive, and work towards building a better world for ourselves. Do you feel it?

Don't try this at home, kids

In case anybody was curious, it's probably not a good idea to be demonstrating the part of the movie Casino where Sharon Stone is doing blow and telling her kid "you shouldn't do this" right as a senior partner on the Associates Commitee is walking by your open door. Before you ask, no, I didn't do it. I was just in the room laughing my ass off while my friend, Associate D, was busted by Partner M. Amusing way to start the day, in the very least.

Now to spend the day covertly attempting to find a new job...

I'm an asset, bitches

What do you know? A two-post day. That's a treat for you, just so you know. Can't have you expecting multiple blogs each day. I'd never get anything else done. But the mood has struck me once again, and I feel compelled to address one of the very important topics noted in my blog from this morning: When will I grow the balls to switch firms? The answer is simple, but can be expressed in so many different ways.

The time is now.
No time like the present.
Haste makes waste.
If you wait until all conditions are perfect to act, you'll never act.
Do or die.
Now or never.

Clearly, others have been faced with the same predicament I find myself in at the present time. Otherwise we wouldn't have so many catchy little slogans to fire ourselves up with. Well friends, you heard it here first, I am officially beginning the search for a new firm to work with. Not for. With. My demands are simple, yet surprisingly un-meetable (I can make up words when I want, so shut it) at my current firm.

(1) Get me into a courtroom. I promise I have a natural talent that will produce favorable verdicts.
(2) Don't treat me like a worthless piece of crap. Yes, I realize I'm only a second year associate, but I am here to learn so that I can help OUR firm grow. I am an asset, bitches.
(3) Don't rip me off. I've become accustomed to my way of life and I don't want to settle for some massive paycut to get what I want. Ok, a small paycut is fine as long as you meet demands (1) and (2).
(4) Respect me, you stupid fuckers. I will gladly show you the same in return. It's funny how that works.

If anybody is aware of a firm that can potentially meet my demands, please contact me. I'm not fucking around anymore. No more languishing in a place that is not only making me miserable but actually hindering my growth as an attorney.

I can't wait to go head-to-head with a partner from my firm someday and just absolute annihilate them in front of an audience. Bring it.

Second's Best

If the saying is right, then this should be a great year for practicing law. I'll also have a hairy chest to look forward to next year, but we'll leave that for another day's worrying. I have a bone to pick with whoever it is that created this whole "first is worst, second's best..." song.

Clearly first is worst in the practice of law. I'll give that to you. First year is hellish, Sisyphus style, repetitive, futile labor. But this song gives false hope that there's a light at the end of that dreaded first year tunnel of doom. Well friends, I'm here to tell you that I have emerged from that dank tunnel and you know what I found? Another goddamn tunnel of doom. This fucking practice is a regular old Labyrinth of tunnels. And they're all full of equally challenging demons.

My only hope as I muddle through my second year of practice, dodging the partners I pissed off while weaving my way through tunnel number one, is that perhaps, just perhaps, there is a treasure chest at the end of tunnel number four. That is how the song goes, right? If there's no goddamn treasure chest, I swear to god I'm going to hunt down the stupid little fucker who gave me hope and strangle him with my bare hands!

Until then, you all get to jump inside my head as I wrestle other important topics like:

• Why did this year's Holiday Party suck so bad?
• Will I be getting a Holiday bonus when I'm called in for my annual review?
• Why does Partner C insist on being such a cheesy-smiled two-faced little bitch?
• When will I grow the balls to make a switch to another firm?
• Will I punch Partner D in the face the next time he asks me a question he already knows the answer to and then tells me to "look in the Court Rules?"
• Will the upcoming Fucking New Guy luncheon ever get planned?

I'm sure you're all terribly excited, but try to contain yourselves for the time being, mmk?